I took a class in dehypnotherapy a long time ago, and there was a meditation exercise where the class leader told us to think about someone who hurt you as a kid. My father, who drank a lot, was who I thought of. Now respond to what they did to hurt you as part of the meditation. 

So while I was breathing I visualized this -- I took a plate of spaghetti and mushed it around on his face. Then I put him in the tiny basement bathroom we had in our house, closed the door and said "now I want you to think about this young man!" That's when the fantasy ended. 

By the end of the workshop we would address the hurtful adult as an adult would -- "I love David very much," I would say to my father, "and I want you to be nice to him."

The point being first find your inner adult and eventually respond like a responsible loving adult that my father should have been. 

Once I learned that technique, I don't have much trouble with letting bad behavior stop me from being true to myself.